A relationship is an investment in another person's life in expectation of mutual emotional and spiritual gain through commitment and understanding. It’s important to evaluate that relationship before too much is invested to easily divest oneself, should the probable risk of dissolution become overwhelming. Why invest so much of yourself building on that relationship, if it isn’t going anywhere, and never will.
Better off to save all that emotional energy, and expenditure of personal time and resources, for someone who will gladly seek to richly reward that very real life investment. And it really is an investment. Just like deciding to put out a certain amount of cash in a mutual fund, it’s similar to deciding to set aside a certain amount of one’s life and personal effort with the same expectation that it will be handled responsibly and in good faith, to earn a dividend in the form of growth of that investment. If it fails to return on that investment, no sense in keeping it in there; whether it’s poor management, lack of effort, or outright fraud, doesn’t matter. Cut your losses and take what’s left of your money, or your dignity, and do your research on the next potential investment, looking to specifically avoid risky ventures regardless of promised return on investment.
So what if the investment “could” yield a fifty per cent payback per year? Or per month? Or per day, for that matter, it is all for nothing (or worse) if the broker was acting sincere simply to get his hands on your cash? The fancy office, the slick portfolio, the smooth talk, the very idea of the lucrative investment, it’s simply part of the means to the end, which all the “investment” he’s going to put into it. He wants you to invest with him because he’s after the cash, as well as the power and control, since at the end of the day, he’s a dishonest broker who values cash no matter what it costs someone else.
Same with an insincere person who promises a loving, stable, fulfilling life, if you’ll just invest your life with them. So what if the relationship “could” result in a genuinely loving and committed partnership, or a marriage, or a safe, stable, productive household? The sweet talk, the flattery, the “romance”, the promises, the declarations of love, the long, intimate conversations, are worth less than a dollar store greeting card if they aren’t backed by genuine, honest intentions. They’re simply a well rehearsed, proven “program” to obtain what he wants.
In the case of the disreputable broker, he wants the cash and the feeling of power that he gets from manipulating someone else to give it to him. In the case of an insincere, fraudulent lover, he typically wants the feeling of accomplishment he gets from convincing a desirable woman to become involved with him. Often he has low self-esteem, despite his attempts to portray himself otherwise, and this is how he tries to feel good about himself without actually putting his chips on the table, so to speak. These guys will fold like a cheap suit once the “relationship” requires any semblance of sincerity. Either way, it’s merely a lucrative conquest to them; a game to be won. An honest relationship will be mutually rewarding, there will be no winner or loser. Both will receive what they invested, and realize gains and growth that would not have been possible without the mutual endeavor.
Someone who loves you:
Spends every moment with you
Distances himself from those who are openly disapproving of you
Is supportive of your issues and problems
Brings you little things that reminded him of you
Thinks about what he can do to make you smile
Smiles when he sees you, forgetting his frustrations and stress
Intervenes on your behalf with others
Remembers your birthday and does whatever he can to make it special
Looks for any opportunity to impress you
Not every person will show their love, in every one of these ways, of course. These
are just examples. Listen to your inner voice...if you genuinely don't feel loved, if
you are deeply lonely even when you are together, it isn't truly love.
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